Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Birthday Lunch

I recently thought of an afternoon from the distant hazy past. She knew it was my birthday, and asked if she could take me out for lunch. It was a work day, but I could get away without anyone noticing...and the twinkle in her voice when she suggested lunch had me smiling with anticipation.

I picked her up, and she directed me where to go, saying that lunch was a birthday surprise. I laughed when I pulled into the the parking lot. Hooters. Burgers, wings, and beer...served by big-breasted girls in skimpy outfits.

"I know you won't mind the sights. And maybe we can get you some special birthday attention."

I laughed. I didn't really want any special birthday attention beyond what I was already getting. I enjoy a well-filled-out tank top as much as the next guy (and maybe even more!) - but I'm not natural at small-talk, and usually find these situations unnatural and awkward.

As it turned out, lunch was a disaster. It must have been our waitress's first day on the job - and almost certainly her last. She wasn't friendly, wasn't attentive, acted frazzled and overwhelmed when we did get her attention, and disappeared for lengthy periods.

The Hooters experience of the bubbly young thing who flaunts her cleavage and makes flirty small-talk while serving your wings? Didn't remotely happen. In the end, we considered ourselves lucky to have gotten anything to eat, and just wanted out of there, as my lunch hour was long-since over.

She apologized over and over on the short drive back to her place, and I assured her it wasn't her fault that the waitress was incompetent. I laughed and said we'd give it another try on another day. She pouted, "But I wanted to see you get something special for your birthday."

I assured her that lunch with her *had* made the day special. I was disappointed too that both the meal and the experience were horribly sub-par, but none of that was her fault - she had tried to give me a lunchtime treat, and I was touched at the thought.

We got back to her place, and she asked if I could come in for a minute, that she had something for me. I was intrigued...there wasn't time for *that*...was there? But I was already very late for work, so what difference would another few minutes make? We got inside, and she asked me to wait a second, and breezed into the other room. Her voice called me, and I walked to her room.

She was laying on the bed, propped on her elbows. Her sundress was up around her panties. She slowly spread her legs...never taking her gaze from mine.

Work? What work???

Happy birthday to me.


  1. I love the way this little minx thinks... ;-)

  2. Holy COW!!!

    Happy Birthday is right!!!!

    Is today your birthday, Mad Max??


    1. Thanks, Shoes. :-)

      No, today isn't my birthday - but it is this month, which is what made me think of that lunch date.

  3. Hooters is fun but very over rated. It's not a brother after all, just another burger place. I do like their salads though. I have had lots of fun there on my business trips since they are open latest near my hotel. Somewhere on my blog is a picture of two hooters girls that were friendly enough to let me take their picture. However, the ending of your birthday surprise beats all the burgers and wings in the world.

    :-) Happy Birthday!

  4. Oh my... I wish I worked with you! I'm having a Paul Harvey moment... I want to the the "REST OF THE STORY!" Guess I'll just have to imagine it... mmmm...