Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Visiting Nurse?

I told the Sensual Goddess that due to some life insurance changes I'm making, a visiting nurse had called to schedule an appointment. She'd be coming over one morning this week to do a quick physical on me and take a blood sample. Our conversation proceeded something like this:
SG (with a twinkle in her eye): Did she have a sexy voice?
Me: Hmmm.... Not "bombshell" sexy, but she didn't sound like an old battle-axe either.
SG: And you scheduled it for Thursday at 9:45, when you knew I'd be out?
Me: She suggested that day and time, not me. (laughing) But now that you mention it, could you be sure to be gone by 9:15?
SG: What if I want to stay and watch?
Me: If you want to hide in the closet and watch, that's fine too.
SG: Yes, I'll hide in the closet.
And she accuses me of having an active imagination?

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Survey of Penis Size

No, I'm not taking a survey. ;-) I read about a scientific survey (link is here), with the intriguing title of "Here Is the Average Penis Size According to the Latest in Penis Measuring Science".

Here's an excerpt:
Penis researchers studying penis size in the penis journal BJU International have analyzed upward of 15,521 penises and have determined the average penis length in 20 previous penis studies is 5.16 inches when erect.
This paragraph raises so many questions. There's such a thing as a penis researcher?!? What does that look like on one's resume?!? There's a penis journal?!? The mind boggles....

Anyway, the link contains a normal distribution, so you can see what percentile you (or your significant other) fall into.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Blogger Relents

As a number of bloggers have noted, Google/Blogger reversed their decision on forcing adult-oriented blogs into private mode.
Google said it has received a big backlash after deciding earlier in the week that bloggers will no longer be able to "publicly share images and video that are sexually explicit or show graphic nudity." The ban was to have taken place on March 23.
Instead, Google said that the company would simply double down on its crackdown of bloggers who use their sites to sell porn.
Thank goodness.

I hadn't decided what, if anything, I would do. I heard mixed things through the grapevine about porting a blog to Wordpress - and most of all, I'd *hate* to lose my comments. A snapshot of the blog without them would be missing something vital.

The thought of going through the blog post-by-post and removing images is simply unthinkable. Partly because of the volume (I note that I'm at 403 posts, making this #404), but even more because removing images will make many of my posts meaningless. I've written a lot of Flash Fiction Friday posts, where you write a story around a given pic. Without the pic, the story loses all context.

So it turns out to not be an issue. For now. Until the next policy change.

Monday, February 23, 2015

Blogger Content Policy Update

I imagine I'm not the only one who received this note from Google's Blogger team:
Dear Blogger User,
We're writing to tell you about an upcoming change to the Blogger Content Policy that may affect your account.
In the coming weeks, we'll no longer allow blogs that contain sexually explicit or graphic nude images or video. We'll still allow nudity presented in artistic, educational, documentary, or scientific contexts, or where there are other substantial benefits to the public from not taking action on the content.
The new policy will go into effect on the 23rd of March 2015. After this policy goes into effect, Google will restrict access to any blog identified as being in violation of our revised policy. No content will be deleted, but only blog authors and those with whom they have expressly shared the blog will be able to see the content we've made private.
Our records indicate that your account may be affected by this policy change. Please refrain from creating new content that would violate this policy. Also, we ask that you make any necessary changes to your existing blog to comply as soon as possible, so that you won't experience any interruptions in service. You may also choose to create an archive of your content via Google Takeout (
For more information, please read here (
The Blogger Team
It looks like this blog will be taken private, unless I choose to do something else in the meantime. I always knew this day might come, but it's a little jarring to find it actually approaching, and with a real live deadline.

One thing I won't do is rail at Google/Blogger. They provide a free service that I've been happy to use, and they're free to change their terms of service however they like.

So I have exactly one month to decide what (if anything) to do....

Friday, February 20, 2015

Elust #67

Photo courtesy of Rebels Notes

Welcome to Elust #67 -

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you're looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it'll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #68? Start with the rules, come back March 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

For our UK readers, we would like to make a special request that you take a moment and fill out this petition to repeal the new censorship laws.

~ This Month's Top Three Posts ~

Yes, Squirting is Real (And it's not pee.)

These men make me SO angry

Still Kinky After All These Years  

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

When It Rains

You want me to read what?

~ Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
Due to technical difficulties there is no Readers Choice selection this month

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!  

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

How to Make Time for Kinky Fuckery

Submissive Power Is Hot Stuff

Topping from the Bottom


Property Milestone

Dead Heat

Submissive power and the storms of life

I Talk A Lot, But Not About That

I Just Want To Be Me

What I Get Out Of Locking A Man in Chastity

BDSM and pick-up artists

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Socks and Sex

Marsala? The Color of My Panties? Who Knew?

Erotic Fiction

Short Strokes: Molasses Makes Me Horny

12 Step Homeopathic Remedy for Scorned Lovers

Alice's Wonderland 

Feel His Breath On Me

Out For A Walk

Playing in the Band


Coming Pretty

The Fall

Erotica After Hours

Dancing in the Dark

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Make Love to Me

I Used to Fake Orgasms. This is Why I Stopped


Brigitta - A Lusty Limerick

Erotic Non-Fiction

With a very sharp knife

black bra and g-string


Meeting Slave Olive for a Cash Point Meet

LachrymoseWhen Two Doms Play...Fuck Tender!


   ELust Site Badge

Friday, February 13, 2015

Inappropriate Valentine

"You can't put out the 'fire' in my heart for you"
I saw this image of an old Valentine's card on my Facebook today, and it made me laugh out loud. Just a bit inappropriate, don't you think?

Then I read the commentary (here) and laughed even harder. I've heard the Sensual Goddess talk glowingly about The Bloggess, and I can see why.

Seriously funny stuff.

Sunday, February 1, 2015

Playing in the Band (Part 3)

(Continued from here)

It took my eyes a second to adjust to the dim light of the storage closet, but there she was leaning against a table. I closed the door behind me, and she stood up and tossed something to me. I caught it and looked. Pink cotton bikini panties. Nice.

She spoke quietly. "We have to be quick." But I already knew that, and I locked the door and was on her in a flash. I backed her up against the cinderblock wall and kissed her hard. My hand slid up her thigh as she fumbled with my jeans. I cupped her bare pussy and found her soaking wet. My pants fell to the floor and her fingers wrapped around the shaft of my cock.

I heard people talking as they walked down the hall outside to the restrooms - another reminder that this needed to be quick. I moved her back to the table, turned her around, and bent her over. I flipped her skirt up onto the small of her back, then pushed my cock into her. I could hear her bite her lip, suppressing a squeal, and I grabbed her hips and thrust hard.

It was good old-fashioned raw animal fucking. My every impulse is to vary things, make it interesting, and make it last longer. But I had to consciously ignore those impulses. My grip on her hips was rough, and I pounded her hard. The wet slapping sound of flesh on flesh was loud in my ears, and I hoped someone walking past the door couldn't hear us.

I could feel the welling up in my balls, and I hissed that I was going to cum. She turned her head and whispered that I should stay. That was music to my ears, and I thrust harder and faster. Then it was on me, and I buried myself and held tight as I unloaded into her. She was trying to stifle the sounds of what sounded like her own climax, and I stayed there for a minute while the waves slowly subsided.

Then it was time to clean up and get back upstairs. I realized that my crotch and thighs were drenched. The panties she tossed me were sitting in a ball on the table, so I grabbed them and cleaned myself up. She was cleaning up with a tissue, so I stuffed her panties in my pocket. I listened at the door, and didn't hear anyone in the hall, so I told her I'd see her upstairs and left.

I made it back in time. My bandmates were just starting to set up for our third set, so I joined them - hoping that there wasn't any obvious evidence of my adventure. A minute late, my waitress came up the stairs, looking maybe a little flushed, but otherwise nonchalant. I smiled to myself that I knew a secret - that she wasn't wearing any panties, and my cum was dripping out of her.

We launched into our set, and I was floating on air. Nothing like that had ever happened to me, and it was exciting as hell. I watched her wait her tables, and she never looked at me to make eye contact. And when our set was over, she was nowhere to be seen. Which was fine - I had no illusions that this was anything more than quick one-time fuck.

My bandmates gave no indication that they knew what had happened. And I almost didn't believe it myself. Until I got home later and found her sodden panties in my pocket.

Monday, January 26, 2015

Playing in the Band (Part 2)

(Continued from here)

Her words reverberated in my head. Really? I should come downstairs and meet her in a basement supply closet during my band's next break? If I want to?

I made my way back to the little stage and joined my bandmates. We started our second set, and it felt and sounded good, as it always does. But I was having trouble concentrating on anything but my waitress.

Was she offering what I think she was offering? I tried and failed to think of any reason she'd invite me there that wasn't a quick fuck. My head spun.

And if that's really what she was offering, did I want it? She didn't make eye contact with me as she waited her tables, but I watched her as we played. My initial assessment was unchanged: not my type at all. Too young, too thin, too rough looking. But the question wasn't whether I'd bring her home to meet my parents, or even take out to dinner - it was whether I was interested in bending her over and fucking her.

Yes, I was interested.

The more I thought about it, the more interested I was. I would definitely go down those stairs and go into the door on the right. I stayed a little skeptical. Maybe she'd change her mind. Or be too busy with work to get away during out break. Or whatever.

We played through the second set, and it went well. People were generous with their applause, and our tip jar was filling up. Then I realized, as our singer announced it, that this would be the last song of the set, and then we'd take a short break. We launched into the song.

My waitress still hadn't made eye contact with me once during the set, and I was a mix of anticipation and curiosity. Would this really happen? It started to seem more likely when she walked past the stage, turned around for the briefest glance at the band, then descended the stairs.

The song ended, and we turned down the P.A. and put our instruments down. My bandmates started for the bar, and I told them I'd be there shortly. My heart was pounding in my chest as I walked down the stairs. Reaching the bottom, I was alone in a short hallway, exactly as she said. Mens' and ladies' rooms on the left, and one door, marked "Employees Only", on the right. I knocked once quickly and opened the door.

(Continued here)

Monday, January 19, 2015

Playing in the Band (Part 1)

We played the last chord of the song, and smiled at each other as people clapped. The singer announced that we'd be taking a short break, and that we'd still be playing two more sets. We stepped off of the small stage, thanking the couple of patrons who were putting some cash in our tip jar.

We walked through the restaurant and took three seats at the bar, and the bartender set us up with tall glasses of ice water with lemon. We'd played here before, and it was a nice little neighborhood restaurant, and a good place to play. It was also gratifying to see some familiar faces - people who'd seen us here before and had come back to see us.

The singer wandered off to talk to someone, and a waitress came behind the bar and started a conversation with the guitar player and me.

"You guys sound great."

We thanked her.

She complimented us up and down, and of course who doesn't like having their ego stroked? She told us that she was learning to play guitar, and we encouraged her to do it.

I looked her up and down. Too young. Too thin...almost scrawny. Even in her standard-issue waitress uniform of black skirt and short-sleeve white blouse, there was a little bit of a rough edge to her, and she had tattoos from shoulder to elbow. But she was sweet as could be and wanted to talk about playing music.

She told us about her guitar - she'd bought it at a pawnshop for $25. I suppressed a smile and turned to my band-mate. "Yours cost a little more than that." I knew it probably cost 100 times that. He laughed and shook his head and said he'd better get back and tune up for the second set.

She ran off to look after one of her tables, and then came back as I was getting ready to go back and get ready to play. She asked what songs we'd be playing, and I told her with a wink that she'd have to listen and find out. She called me a bastard, and we both laughed.

She paused, then asked me how long the second set would be? I told her, around 45 minutes.

"As soon as your set is over, come and see me. Go down the stairs. The bathrooms are on the left. There's a supply closet on the right." She paused. "If you want to."

Without waiting for a response, she turned and went back to work.

(Continued here)

Sunday, December 21, 2014

The Hot/Crazy Matrix

The YouTube clip below ("The Hot/Crazy Matrix - A Man's Guide to Understanding Women") is the funniest thing I've seen all month. It was forwarded to me by the Sensual Goddess, who admitted that there's a lot of truth in it.

A lot of truth? I'm forwarding this to the Nobel Prize committee for consideration.

P.S. - I appreciate the queries asking if I'm alive and well. I'm both. Life is both good, challenging, and always interesting. I still have stories to tell, and I'm trying to figure out how to tell them. Hopefully there will be more posts soon.